i really need my own apartment
really really
i love living in the sisters house
but really
for my own sanity and productivity...

things i can do with my own place comfortably:
-take over the walls with art, my own and those needed for inspiration
-play music that resonates with the creative process i'm going through to produce a story
-sing
-play guitar
-spread out on the floor and EXERCISE
-dance
-PRAY! recite to my heart's content
-wake up to recitation floating through the room
-a space to cry
-a space to act out the voices in my head without seeming crazy
-a place to welcome guests and hold meetings and store equipment

the trade off:
-no hala!
-no conversations with hala at night
-no discovery of the musical jems hala puts on my computer
-greater distance bw me & hala, which threatens her being my "fashion consultant" for the screening afterparties
-loss of a personal life outside the film community
-lack of stimulation from people (not necessarily true. think of manchester)
-elida, my landlady. i'd miss her and her warmth. she takes good care of us. and it's so interesting to rent from an evangelical hispanic minister
-the comfort & security of muslims in the surrounding houses
-roomates to help out when you're locked out, or when you need something in an emergency, or to PA on your movies
-i'd have to pay more for renting own place (cheapest i found with acceptable conditions $600/mo. now i pay $375 to share a room).
-lack of transportation from campus cruiser if i live beyond its boundaries
-pay my own internet/phone bill
-overall, i'd pay about $3k more per year. or $6k more over the next two years while finishing up grad school. That's a lot of dough. Is it worth it? I really need my sanity. I cant work freely without having a personal realm.

not a trade off:
-proximity to mosque. never really go anyway, feel disconnected from it. establishment unresponsive about setting up better means of communication within the community
grrr